Always Somewhere
by Gallifrey Byrned
Summary: No one was at the Playground and Skye got bored and did a little digging only to find out it was Coulson's birthday. Skoulson. One-shot.


**A/N: So, I didn't see much of Coulson's birthday fics and I was bored and had a few hours to spare. I came up with this. A little inspired by Scorpions' Always Somewhere because I was listening to it on repeat. It's a little Skoulson but yeah. I don't know what to say about it actually.**

**Disclaimer: Like the moon, I don't own the characters as well.**

* * *

The day had been quiet.

Simmons had been off to visit Fitz since the morning and Tripp joined after when he was done with Skye's combat training. Koenig seemed to be stuck in his office, occupying himself with the video games where as May had done tai chi before heading out for lunch, having always wanted to go out and lead what she calls a "temporary normal life".Skye could not help but to chuckle in amusement, to see May being warmer and cracking jokes.

Skye had missed it, living a "normal life" - no missions, no guns, no briefings. And it was nice to her that this time round, her 'normal life' was surrounded by people who cared for her and ones that she cared about. She could not help but to wonder if that was what it feels like to have a family. Although it's been only a few months, Skye had not seen any changes since Coulson had been appointed as the new director.

She was tasked by him to create secure lines between the different SHIELD bases for communications and that was it. Coulson would travel with Tripp or May two to three times every two weeks to other SHIELD bases, narrowing down and eliminating HYDRA sleeper agents in each one. He was taking things slowly but yet she never seemed to see him getting sleep.

She had Koenig's tracker tablet duplicated to her own and she'd displayed it on the personal screen in her room like there is a personal screen in everyone else's. She has always been a late sleeper and a late riser before she joined the unit and the only thing that changed was her rising hours. As she could not help but to wonder about the Playground like she would wonder about the Bus in the middle of the night, she'd see Coulson still suited up in his office flipping books with the door wide open. Other nights, she'd find him sitting in the lounge alone but she never dared to approach. As much as she had resisted from digging into the files of her colleagues, that day, she was too bored, everyone being out and her not exactly having a company.

The brunette hacktivist pulled out her laptop, plugging in the hard drive that she'd backed the SHIELD files into.

_"I trust you that whatever you do with this, you can't go beyond files that needed a level 10 clearance, you got me? I don't mind you looking into the team's profile but that is all, do you understand?" Coulson's reminder rang inside her head._

_"Level 10 is the highest clearance level. You trust me up to that? Why is it only until 10? Why not all the way?"_

_She remembered seeing Coulson clenched his jaw tightly, hesitating before turning away to answer her, "You wouldn't like the truth."_

_"I could handle the truth enough when you told me where I came from and whatever it was they injected into me. I think I can handle whatever you have in store. I thought we're in the dark together, AC."_

_"Do you trust me, Skye?"_

_"Yes, I do. But-,"_

_"Please. I do this to protect all of us. Bear with me for this one, okay?"_

Now, she sat before her laptop, clicking through the files to find his profile - to know a bit more about the man who had recruited her, hoping to discover something that could tell her why he was the man he is now.

But her dig didn't go far when her focus got stuck at his birth date - July 8, 1964.

"Wait, _what?_"

* * *

Coulson stood in the middle of the open roof that was blended to look like part if the hills their base was under, staring out the woods that surrounded their hideout, thinking about nothing at all, drowning himself in the silence of his surroundings.

"You seriously need to change your methods of celebrating your birthday, AC."

The newly appointed director spun around, surprised that Skye could find him there. It has always been hideaway spot at the base as he thought no one could ever find it, "I don't plan to celebrate it."

"Well, uh," Skye approached him, looking about the setting, "That's kind of a lonely way to live."

"I wasn't supposed to be living anyway," Coulson tried to joke.

But instead, Skye felt her chest tightened, saddened at the tone of his speech, "You planning to give up on life?"

Coulson let out a small laugh and turned his back towards her again, facing his original view, "Honestly? When I first recovered, yeah. My therapist-,"

"You had a _therapist?_"

Coulson nodded, "Fury thought I'll be needing one. And I sure did."

"PTSD?"

"That's what my therapist said."

"Didn't say you had one in your file."

"You looked through my file?"

"I was bored." Skye shrugged although Coulson was not even facing her as she heard a soft chuckle.

She walked up to his side, hearing him sigh out loud, "I know. It wouldn't seem like me to say I wanted to give up. But that was a really rough patch. I couldn't handle the nightmares, my emotions were really off the scale."

Skye folded her arms, subconsciously mirroring him, "So, can satellites pick up images of this base?"

"Good question, Skye. You're thinking like the director of SHIELD. Good first questions as an agent. The answer is, no. It'll only be seen like a hills in these woods."

"Hmm."

And silence fell between them. Skye could feel the tension between both of them and she wanted to get rid of it. She just wanted a simple conversation but his statement that she knew he had intended as a joke made her realise that he may be needing a company more than he ever thought he needed. Now, she didn't even know where to begin.

"I know, you just wanted to offer company." Coulson turned to face her, hands in his pockets, "Thank you."

"I just wanted to say 'Happy Birthday.'"

"Hmm."

"Maybe I should have just left you alone." Skye turned, her head hanging low as she began to walk away, scolding herself mentally for suddenly losing track of what she had intended to do.

"I like red velvet cheesecakes." Coulson blurted.

It surprised her, that he suddenly expressed his interests, surprised her enough that she stopped in her tracks to turn and face him again, to see him still standing at the same spot, "I always go to this restaurant every year and have dinner at the same table. End off with a red velvet cheesecake. Most of the years, I spent it alone. But there was a brief period where I spent it with someone. We would have a dance afterwards."

Skye closed up the distance between them as she walked back to him as he continued, "She was shy but I would still pull her out for it."

She saw a smile, a sparkle of reminiscence in his eyes as he recalled the memory. A genuine emotion she never seem to see him express in front of anyone. She had seen his anger, his concern but never, what is this, affection?

"Well, it _is_ your birthday. What do you want to do?"

Coulson hesitated, locking his eyes with hers.

"You're thinking." Skye took a step towards him.

"No, I just-," He looked away again and sighed, "It's nothing."

Skye whined, punching him lightly in the arm as much as trying to cheer him up, "Oh, come on. I didn't just wasted seconds to your hesitation."

He laughed softly and that caused a smile of her own to spread across her face, "Come on, tell me. What do you want to do? You want me to phone May to get a cake on her way back? You want to have dinner? I can cook dinner and be your waiter."

Coulson laughed again, shaking his head as he turned back to her while pulling out his phone from the inside of his suit jacket, "I uh," he unlocked his phone and went to the music player, "I just needed company."

A song started playing, a melodious plucking of the guitar strings, a familiar slow rock.

"It's by, uh, Scorpions. It's called-,"

"Always Somewhere. I know." Skye subconsciously stared at the director's face as he occupied himself by putting his phone back in his jacket pocket. And she didn't look away when he locked her gaze with hers again. She felt no sense of awkwardness at all. Instead, she felt comfortable - too comfortable in fact just looking at his face.

"You don't have to do this if you don't want." Coulson shrugged and retreated.

"No, no. Come on," Skye snapped out her trance and smiled childishly, raising her shoulders,"It'll be fun."

It took a while before Coulson could look up from staring at his feet and took his hands out of his pockets and held a hand out, "So, uh- Can I have this dance?"

As she closed the gap between the two of them, her hand accepting his offer, Skye felt his touch softened when he placed a hand on her waist. Skye raised her other hand, resting it on his shoulder as both of them adjusted their feet before locking their gazes again. The moment she felt him moving, Skye followed his every step, letting the rhythm playing from his phone get to her feet, allowing the music to guide her, authorizing Coulson to lead her. It was an easy dance, a calm, relaxing one and by every second that passed, she could not help but to sink her head lower and lower till it rested on his shoulder, almos nuzzling into his neck. She felt him shudder when she did that, but she was relieved when she felt him ease himself in an instant.

"AC?" She looked up with her head still rested on his shoulder.

"Hmm?" He replied with a tone of such tender.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. It's just- I haven't danced in a while." Coulson leant in and rested the side of his head gently against hers, and held her tighter as he took a deep breath in.

"Hey. Don't think too much."

She heard a soft chuckle, "I'm not."

They spun together slowly to the ballad, the music combined with the ambient noises to form a melodious symphony that taught their feet to move together in rhythm and tempo, in harmony. Everything was hypnotizing, up to the second when the song started to subside and she felt him kiss her hair. He didn't pull away until the song ended and neither did she, taking the advantage to hold him a little longer, a little tighter.

When both pulled back their heads slowly in unison, their cheeks grazed against each other and their lips were inches apart, feeling each other's breath, causing Skye's pulse to suddenly race. Neither of them broke their body contact, still leaning against each other, embracing the warmth of it as the winds blew.

And she was too smitten by him, by his politeness to ask her for a dance when she had clearly stated her willingness to accompany him in whatever he does, his gentleness when he held her and led her across the open roof to the music.

It was too... Mesmerizing.

Captivating.

Her pulse raced faster when their faces filled in the gap between them, stronger by every beat that she could hear it pumping in her ears, feeling the hammering of her heart against her chest almost 4 times faster - only to realise the she was actually feeling Coulson's heartbeat pounding against her own.

Through the suit, she felt it subtly against her body but it was clearly thumping as powerful and as quickly as it was. Her blood was just gushing all over her body but still, she got giddy, feeling the corner of his lips against hers and if she had not had a good grip of herself, Skye swore she could have tumbled over when he suddenly pulled away, apologised and hurriedly walked off, leaving her alone on the now empty roof in her own mist of confusion, disappointment and anger.

_Anger?_

* * *

Coulson raked his fingers through his hair, sighing out loud, "What have I done?"

Pulling at his tie vigorously and unbuttoning the top button, he reflected at his move to suddenly leave Skye by her own. Coulson dropped himself into his bed, covering his face with his palms, "Why did you do that?"

It was more like a scolding for himself than a question. But still, he was trying to find the reasons for his actions.

Because that feeling of holding her close, his hand in hers, moving in sync to the music - it wasn't what his mind agreed to his body about when it decided to pull away from her. In fact, he had needed it - to be able to wrap her in his arms, to see her face before him, to embrace her.

It gave him a sense of security, provided him the company he never knew he needed - it gave him hope.

Hope that maybe things would turn up better.

Hope that there is still happiness for him - a chance at bliss.

Or even love.

Coulson rolled over on his side, exhaling loudly before pulling his wallet out from inside his jacket pocket. In between his cards were booth photos from another life - his past life.

He smiled at the picture of the man he used to be holding on close to the woman who once held his heart - the musician that added a brief harmony into his monotonous life.

Audrey Nathan.

Audrey was the reason he had backed away from Skye.

Almost two years may have passed but there wasn't a single day that he didn't think of her. He'd recall the memories, the moments, the conversations.

Because that was his only way of getting to sleep peacefully - Audrey was his counterbalance. The one that had given him the opportunity to live his life a slightly more normally, the one that make him forget about his scars when he returned from every other mission. Self-cooked dinners, movie marathons, grocery shopping and endless hours of browsing the internet just watching silly videos. He missed that. The quiet times.

And it was the same for Skye. He had always felt an attraction for her, the girl who had led her normal life a bit not normally. But Skye had always been that person who coaxed, who reasoned, who cared. Skye had always been that person on the team who openly shows her concern. Her unproductive 'me-time' simply scrolling through the internet inside their SUV, her witty comebacks for him - it pulled him out of the seriousness of the whole constantly-an-agent-of-the-organisation thing. He had always regarded as being the most ordinary that she had managed to return that slice of reality back into his James Bond life.

And maybe that was the cause why he had left her - Skye reminded him too much of Audrey.

Other than that, it was also the guilt that overwhelmed him - the inability to tell Audrey the truth. The fact that he is still alive and he had left her to believe that she had lost him, he wanted to be able to return to her more than anything else but he could not seem to bring it about despite him being able to make the rules now, being the Director.

And he didn't want to hurt Skye in any way because of him being stuck to his past.

He wants to move on.

But he just didn't know how.

* * *

In the lounge, Skye sat herself down on the couch before the television, watching about a news she wasn't paying attention to as she clutched on to the cushion was still angry, disappointed and confused. She had just wanted to accompany him, do something nice for him because she knows she had owed him so much.

But being ditched?

Skye thought that was little too much.

But why was she so angry?

Suddenly her train of thoughts got disrupted as Coulson appeared before her.

Skye noticed that he had taken his tie and jacket off, leaving the top button open and he had never looked more casual as she ever saw him then.

"Skye?"

She kept quiet.

"I wanted to apologize for what I did to you."

And she still kept quiet. Skye could have asked for his reasons but instead, she waited for him to continue as he sat beside her, "It was just a little painful for me just now."

"What do you mean, painful?" Skye realized that probably her actions had reminded him of his past in which it was true when she heard him sigh. She took note of that. The sighing. He must have had so much to think about.

"I just- You reminded me of Audrey. The woman I was together with before I died." Skye continued to listen as he fiddled with his fingers, "I wanted to move on. But then, after all those years. I realize I still can't."

"I'm sorry."

"I see her in you, Skye. I see it all the time. And that is probably the reason why I am attracted to you."

"Coulson, look. I'm sorry."

"No. _I'm _sorry," Coulson took her hand, "I didn't mean to use you as her replacement for her. I don't want you to think that I want you in this team because I needed someone like her. In any way, I don't want hurt you."

Skye silenced.

"She takes initiatives to cheer me up just like you did. And it was a little hard for me to get over the fact that honestly, I was thinking of her all the while when we were dancing. Because that's the kind of thing she'd do as well."

"I don't mi-,"

"No. You are your own self. And that just now, that was lovely." Coulson cupped her chin and leant in, placing a soft kiss on her cheek, "Thank you, Skye."

It left her stunned, it left her speechless.

And when he walked away, she realised that as much as she sees the strong man she thought he was, Skye sees a man who was broken. A man trapped in his past. A man lonely then, and lonelier now.

* * *

**A/N: I thought the ending was a little bleargghhh but yeah. Boredom calls and a few hours spared. I came out with that. Thanks for reading it up until the end though!**


End file.
